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October 31, 2007

Aww! I Mean, Eeek! Yes, Eeek!

Behold, the cutest little ghost pirate ever! He would have nothing to do with the hat or the sash or the sword, but still! It's the bones that make the ghost pirate. Well, that and the curse.

Now, what to do with the three and a half pounds of Starburst we have left over.

To close the night, a rousing round of my favorite Halloween song (as of ten minutes ago): "Werewolf Bar Mitzvah!" performed by Tracy Jordan of 30 Rock:

October 26, 2007


For those of you without cats, this is, in fact, 100% accurate:

This has been a Public Service Announcement.

October 23, 2007

Do They Sell Stillsuits On eBay?

Yeah, so, I'm not dead. Just thirsty, for some reason.

There's nothing quite like being told where you live is facing an water shortage. Something about just being told that makes you quite thirsty. Like right now. The back of my throat has that slightly cloggy feeling that makes you want to swallow, your tongue tingles ever so slightly, and the insides of your cheeks start to hum a little tune of, "Hey, go get a drink."

And now I have. Stupid forbidden fruit water.

According to our illustrious gov'nor, if my general vicinity doesn't win its lawsuit to stop releasing water from the various lakes that provide us with H20, we'll run out of vital fluids by January 30.

January 30. I take another sip. Stupid psychology.

East Point, a town southwest of Atlanta but within the 285 perimeter, announced it has 37 days of water left. 37 days. After that, they'll have to try and get water from Atlanta. Which of course, has so much to spare.

Naturally, the Army Corp of Engineers doesn't see a problem, of course. They've announced that according to their calculations, we've got months and months of water available to us. Uh huh. Considering the roll of the dice here, I'm curious to see their math.

Stupid Army Corp of Engineers.

Interestingly, as much as I don't really like the idea of having to use bottled water if I want cook a box of mac&cheese, taking sponge baths, and setting up a chemical toilet in the backyard, I find myself kind of curious to see my little stretch of suburbia return to the 19th century. Perhaps we can manage a cholera epidemic just to top things off.

Stupid Imp of the Perverse.

Reading: Equal Rites, by Terry Pratchett.

October 12, 2007

Non Sequitur Edition

Despite all my talk of all the books I have on hand, my next two reading ventures were Making Money, by Terry Pratchett (a library book) and Goblin Hero, by Jim Hines. That second was another new book that I a) came across at Borders and b) was horrified to realize I hadn't bought yet. Both of them highly enjoyable, and well recommended.

* * *

We've bought our pumpkins, this time shopping from a roadside stand that was guarded by three strange men. The first had no eyes, the second no ears, and the third no tongue. Their pumpkins were alien things, with tentacles and ghost rinds and a tendency to flicker in and out of existence. The men would only be paid in secrets, like who was the first girl I kissed and what do I dream about at night when the train whistle blows. Oh, and they were shriners. Brrr.

* * *

Now that I've trimmed back the bushes at the front of the house, it's pretty damn bright in the garage in the mornings.

* * *

Ian had developed a love of crayons. In order to keep him from trying to create wall murals for us, we're now having to keep him seated in his high chair when he feels creative (read: scribbly).

He is still adjusting to this.

* * *

I discovered this evening that I have to start taking some vacation time off, or I will begin losing it. The vacation time, that is. My sanity is just fine. Poor me, having to go on vacation. It's a cruel world.

* * *

Sent bio info to Electric Velocipede and Flytrap. I'm guessing that means my stuff will soon be making appearances in those fine venues.

* * *

Judging by the most recent examples in tonight's Chinese takeout, fortune cookie writers are getting lazier and lazier.

* * *

It's finally turned a crisp fall here, which means my walks to and from satellite parking are pleasant, delightful things, not sweaty Bataan Death marches. Admittedly, crossing the four lane road is a bit more exciting than I sometimes like, but it does keep me paying attention.

* * *

I haven't been to archery since Ian was born. I need to do something about this. Possibly during my future soon-to-be-mandatory days off. Hmm. That just came to me.

* * *

I am convinced Spider-Man's name is hyphenated to prevent it from becoming a last name. "Hi, I'm Ed Spidermun, a CPA from Long Island."

* * *

"Fafner's blood trickled onto Siegfried's hand, burning it. Siegfried put it to his mouth to soothe it and discovered that the dragon's blood had given him the power to understand the speech of birds. A forest bird told Siegfried of a treasure hidden in a cave."

So remember, if you're hiding treasure, make sure to first distract the birds with a big bag of seed. The good stuff, now, with sunflowers and mullet and corn. Don't be cheap. You can spare some of that treasure. I mean, c'mon.

October 04, 2007

The Back Of Logs

"Who wants a library full of books you've already read?"
--Harlan Ellison

It's true. I've got a lot of books. Not only that, but I've got a lot of books I haven't read yet. I like to think of this as an occupational hazard for librarians (probably publishers too). Most readers have a To Read pile, books they haven't gotten around to reading yet. More dedicated folk have a To Read shelf. I actually have a To Read bookcase. No, really:

And there it is, in all it's glory. If you're wondering what the blank space is for, that's so the cats have a space to hang out. And it's also a place to (ahem) add more books if necessary. It's probably enough to keep me busy for a year or two, what with my relatively limited free time.

How did it come to this? Well, I blame Iowa. No, really. For a couple years we lived in a fairly small town that didn't have a decent bookstore. A few small used places with really limited selection, a Waldenbooks at the mall, and that was it. The nearest good-sized bookstore was a Barnes & Noble seventy miles away. So what we would do was, every few weeks, we'd saddle up and ride south. When we left the place, we'd have a dozen new purchases to read. Did that for two years, and managed to keep up with them. My To Read pile stayed of reasonable size.

Then we moved back to the Atlanta area, where the nearest bookstore was a Borders about two miles away, where it was easy to go every couple nights. There were also three or four good used places within a reasonable distance. And like an athlete who stops competing but keeps eating, my To Read pile grew and grew. And then grew some more. I had so many books I hadn't read yet, I had to put little pieces of paper in them to remind myself I hadn't read them yet. When we recently moved our library to give Ian a playroom, I pulled them all together. The top two shelves are double-stacked paperbacks, and even most of the hardbacks have a row of paperbacks squeezed in front. Best estimate, it's a few hundred books sitting right my bedside. If I say, I need something to read, all I have to do is reach out a hand and grab a book.

So now that I've so thoroughly impressed upon you that I've got a lot to read, what am I actually reading?


Blood Engines, by T. A. Pratt. That's right, a brand new book, one that I couldn't wait to buy later on. Furthermore, this fresh upstart skipped the line past all those others. And well it should. It's got just what you need: strong central female character, magic, wit, and general badassery. Pratt is a good, fun writer who knows his way around the English language and knows how to entertain the reader. I'm thoroughly enjoying it. Now go forth and procure yourself a copy, already. But not mine.

Reading: Duh.

October 02, 2007

Adam West: Dark Knight

Adam West: Dark Knight. All someone needs to do now is get in there with some George Reeves stillshots to cover Supes' part. I hope Frank Miller sees this and cries.

* * *

Lisa left bright and early (about two hours ago, actually) on a sudden trip to Salem. Even witches need IU consultation, it seems. Any second now, the boy'll wake up. Good thing I've had my tea.