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June 29, 2005

I, For One, Welcome Our New Scandinavian Furniture Overlords

IKEA!
Thank you for entering our lives!
IKEA!
You mock inferior lamps!
IKEA!
You watch over our children!
IKEA!
We sing songs of praise to you!
IKEA!
We smite our enemies in your vastness!
IKEA!
Is there nothing you cannot do?
IKEA!
IKEA!
IKEA!

June 28, 2005

Just So Long As They Don't Scoop Out My Brains

51 day personal rejection from ChiZine on a poem. While they passed, they did say they "liked the way I think". Aw shucks and other polite notions.

The reading of Realms issues bore fruit. I was entertained (prime consideration). I made use of my subscription (money not wasted). And I found a couple stories to recommend for the Nebula (contribute in some tiny way to the field). Mmm, satisfaction.

These Stinky Cheeses That I Can't Describe

It was a long day at the book mines. The AC didn't work part of the time, and a student on the reference floor smelled like cheese. Stinky cheese, with extra funk. Made for a long afternoon.

But that's all right, because now I'm home, changed in jeans, got the cats about me, and I just learned over email that my poem "Weird Android" has been accepted for small press mag Tales of the Talisman. Whee!

Now, pass the muenster.

June 27, 2005

How To Furnish That First Apartment Right Out Of College

FedExFurniture.com. Build furniture (couch, table, chairs, bed, desk) on the cheap using FedEx boxes. FedEx apparently provides these things for free, on request. Sounds like a corporate policy that might soon be revised.

Ingenious. Also very, very sad.

In some writerly news, I learned this weekend that issue 2 of Apex Digest, containing my flash story "Orders," is now out. Also, that my "The Wizard Gets A Haircut" will be out in the Fall issue of Abyss & Apex (October). Lovely, lovely.

Update: Stronger evidence that Apex is out; namely, I received my contributor's copy today (yay). Eagerly I opened it, only to discover that my story isn't listed in the TOC (boo! also, huh?). Finally I found it in the back, listed under "Parting Shots." Ok, so it's the last thing in there. Good strong placement. But the lack of complete TOC credit seems odd to me.

Reading: Back issues of Realms of Fantasy.

June 24, 2005

Thank You, Shelley

This is the award I want on my shelf. Even if I have to buy it myself.

I have a hole in the crook of my right arm, after visiting the doctor this morning. Blood sample for a test, nothing serious. It has a small bandage over it.

Gus jumped up into my lap and started sniffing the wound. For a long time. A little too long. I had to push him away when he tried to push his nose under the bandage.

Always nice to be reminded that, under that sweet and fuzzy exterior, he's still basically a meat-eating, blood-drinking carnivore.

Update: This has been edited for clarity, and to stop Lisa from giggling.

June 23, 2005

Randomly Linking To Random Links

Well, not entirely random. But there's something for everyone, I'm sure:

Reading: American Gods, by Neil Gaiman. Yes, for the first time. Yes, I've had an autographed copy for how long? This should give you an idea of how many unread books I've got lying around my place.

June 22, 2005

It's No "Blowtorch!", But It's Got Potential

I see the wonder that is Infernokrushing is starting to spread to the other fine arts. For example, dance.

June 21, 2005

The Truth Revealed

Whee! Got an email from Lenox Avenue, telling me my story "Matilda" has been accepted for their "Mechanical Oddities" ish in September. How nice. Yes, nice: that's a lovely way to phrase it. Makes me sound all cool and blasé, when in actuality I tapdanced around my office when I saw the email, yelling at the ceiling that I was a writing deity. Nice to know some things never change.

June 20, 2005

Stupid Brain

Just discovered I was supposed to go to the doctor's this morning (nothing serious; just a lab work follow-up from my physical a couple months ago). Thot it was tomorrow. Aren't they supposed to call and remind you so this sort of thing doesn't happen? Lazy doctors.

June 19, 2005

What I Did On My Summer Vacation

Well, it was a fun trip. For those not in the know, I, Lisa, and my parents went out to Los Angeles to see my brother Paul and Joy get married. Of course, if you're going to make that kind of trip, you might as well go early and look around some. Which we did. We're not fools.

Saturday we flew out, and upon our arrival in LA, rented some wheels. And just as we drove it out of the lot, we had to exchange it, as we noticed a light on the dash that shouldn't be there. After a brief negotiation with the rental agency, we promptly drove south to San Diego. Lisa had been there before, so she guided us to and fro as we played tourist there for a few days. Did lots of the usual things, such as drank margaritas in Old Town, visited the Wild Animal Park (the Zoo's breeding facility), rode the carousel at Seaport Village, and took a harbor tour. We also drove over Coronado Island, then down to Imperial Beach and walked in the surf for a bit. Well, except for Dad. Stubborn, he is. We also had our first earthquake, a 5.2, at breakfast. Felt like an extremely large truck had parked next to our table.

Tuesday we drove back up to LA, but we took the Pacific Coast Highway partway to stop in San Juan Capistrano to see the mission. Gorgeous. We cruised a little more up the PCH before the traffic became too annoying. Eventually we clawed our way onto the interstate and drove the rest of the way in. We stayed in the Magic Castle Hotel in Hollywood. A very cool hotel to stay at, and I'm not just saying that because they pass out free popsicles if you're sitting poolside. The tourist thing was a little limited, as we had new in-laws to meet and such, but we did do a few things. Wednesday we went and saw the La Brea Tar Pits, something my Dad had always wanted to see (and according to our Frommer's, so did Prince Charles). Then the 'rents went to have dinner with Joy's mom, and we met up with our buddy Abbie. In a moment of complete fanboydom, the three of us went and saw Batman Begins. Opening night. At Grauman's Chinese Theater (the actual theater, not the Grauman Six multiplex nearby). Great place to see a movie, and happily Batman was pretty decent as well.

Thursday we had our second earthquake after lunch, a mere 4.9. Felt like someone was trying to poke their way up through the seat of my chair. Afterwards was the wedding rehearsal, and then we drove out to Santa Monica. The rehersal dinner had eighteen of us in Buca di Beppo's papal room, eating with gusto. Friday we had lunch at Roscoe's House of Chicken 'n' Waffles, then off to the wedding. Took place at the Yamashiro Restaurant, and the air was so amazingly clear you could see all the way to Long Beach. The ceremony was lovely and went off with no major glitches. For example, I didn't forget the ring, drop the good reverend's notebook, or forget to pass over the flowers for the parents (yes, it's all about me). Afterwards there was much eating and drinking. Joy's brother taught Lisa how to use chopsticks. And the Goodyear blimp circled overhead for some inexplicable reason. And we got up at the crack of Saturday and flew home. All told, a success. Here's to many years of happiness for Joy and Paul.

Reading: Quite a bit, when sitting on a plane or unwinding in the hotel. Spin State, by Chris Moriarty. The Icarus Hunt, by Timothy Zahn. Eternity Row, by S. L. Viehl. And A Hat Full of Sky, by Terry Pratchett. Currently reading Wicked, by Gregory Maguire.

Update: Oh, yes, I forgot. Got a 57 day rejection from Flash Me, a short blurb request from Apex, and about a billion junk mails.

June 18, 2005

Got More Cars Than The Beach Got Sand

Back from Los Angeles, LA, City of Angels, Lala Land, Lotusville, etc., where I acted as best man in my brother Paul's wedding. A success, as neither bride nor groom decided to flee to Tijuana (or any place else, for that matter). More details later, as I currently need a shower and some sleep.

June 11, 2005

Happy Birthday

To my sweetie, that is! And to everyone else who shares this birthday, I s'pose (but really, happy birthday, Lisa!).

June 09, 2005

On The Other Hand...

...a Simpsons movie is in the works. Heh. Shades of Itchy and Scratchy: The Movie.

Oh, and last night got a 53 day e-jection for a piece of flash fiction from Alien Skin. Ay Carumba!

June 07, 2005

Watch Out

A 51 week (that's 358 days) e-jection from the Borderlands 6 antho. Said nice things, called it well-written, etc., but the ending was a bit too predictable. Fair enough.

The Watchmen movie has been killed by the studio, a decision that both disappoints and reassures at the same time. In other words, at least it won't end up like the last Alan Moore adaptation.

Also: please, won't someone think of the wee little gnomes?

June 06, 2005

Keep Moving

As enamored as I am with infernokrushing, I also feel the call of The New Blurb. Besides, it's much more efficient. Although there's probably not as much fire. Hmm.

June 04, 2005

This Is Why I'm Watering The Lawn

I am the Nile!

At 4145 miles from my furthest extremity to the Mediterranean Sea, I outdo the Amazon to become the world's longest river. The piranhas hate me.

Beneath me lies an underground river with six times my volume. I kept this remarkably quiet for several thousand years. In fact, I'm full of mystery; my source wasn't discovered until 1862. I'm also full of water. And crocodiles. And nuclear pharaoh machines that run on light and can see through time.

Which Extremity of the World Are You?
From the towering colossi at Rum and Monkey.

(via the esteemed David Moles)

Reading: Remaking History and Other Stories, by Kim Stanley Robinson.

June 01, 2005

Henry! The Flit Is Useless!

My story, "No Mosquito is a God," is up online at Lone Star Stories. Have a look, whydontcha? Flash fun, sez I.

I'd also like to call your attention to Pam's highly enjoyable poem, "My Brother, He Has a Wonderful Thing." Ahem, ahem. Point, point.

How Others See Us

A quote, supplied by the lovely Rachel Heslin:

"Libraries are brothels for the mind. Which means that librarians are the madams, greeting punters, understanding their strange tastes and needs, and pimping their books."

---Guy Browning
Um, sure?

Ooh, Pretty

Hoo. Claims to be the Coolest Picture Ever. That's for posterity to decide, isn't it?